The 10 minute wobble

This weekend we went away for our pre-season boot camp, two days of showjumping with Simon Grieve and cross country with Phoebe. I. Am. So. Sore.

DOMS and tiredness aside, I’m feeling in the best position yet for our upcoming season.

Our first day was fantastic – I got some really good ideas for exercises to try at home from Simon and I’m finally starting to feel the balance between forwardness and energy in our showjumping canter. Out on the cross country course, I was warming up and couldn’t stop grinning – I was having fun.

“Heather, I’m going to put a tin lid on you, because I think you’re getting a bit overexcited.”

– Phoebe, after Socks and I warmed up. She wasn’t wrong!

We did calm down, and I really felt the benefit of slowing down, taking a breath and giving the both of us more time to plan and think about what we were doing. We jumped two Trakehners, first time, no stops. Socks was happy, I was happy, it was a good day!

I first went on the cross country course at Milton Keynes four years ago, when I was twenty and fully in the grip of being a nervous wreck. I looked up at the giant picture frame fence and turned green. I didn’t even dare to hope that one day I’d jump it, purely because the very idea made me want to turn around and gallop in the other direction.

What a difference the last year has made!

The shortest wobble

Showjumping the next day went just as well, but even so, walking down onto the cross country course, I felt the pit of my stomach go. I didn’t get it – I’d had such a good day, and ten minutes ago I’d felt so confident. I had absolutely no reason to feel nervous, yet there I was, breathing my way through it.

We warmed up the same as the day before. We had a slight misunderstanding on strides where I saw a long one, but thought Socks would probably go for the short one. Socks also saw the long stride and took it. It didn’t help.

Before long, Socks had started to stop, I’d started to freeze, and breathing was a whole other issue. “I need to get a bloody grip!” I said to Phoebe and Rachel, furious at myself. Phoebe told me to jump the fences again, take a breath, and kick.

And, I did.

Every time I had an anxious thought, I told Socks to go forward. I kicked on, I breathed, and I got through it. As quickly as my nerves had set in, I’d told them to sod off. I couldn’t believe it. I hadn’t fallen off, and more importantly Socks was still happy to jump things for me.

The second time I came on the cross country course at Milton Keynes, two years ago when I was twenty-two, and going for my first go over solid fences for eighteen months, I looked at that fence and hoped one day I’d have my life together enough to jump it.

So although before I went, I wanted to have a confident weekend where I didn’t make any mistakes, I was actually happier I’d had a wobble. I feel stronger now I know I can get over them myself, and they don’t mean game over. I can ride through my nerves!

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A good day all round

This week, it wasn’t just me and Socks who had a fab time. I mean, Socks was fab and all, jumping a good sized 90 track and we’re feeling good going into areas next week, but Mum and Gem are the stars of this show!

Way back when, Mum and I used to share our little pony, Lego, who was a complete angel. Since then, Mum rode Socks but it’s fair to say that they never really “clicked”. The last time Mum jumped was in 2015, with Socks, and it didn’t end well. Consequently, I’m not the only one that “Kick on and breathe” applies to.

Back to now, and Mum now has her own best bear buddy – Gem. Gem is a 15.2 5yo Welsh x TB, and quite possibly the cutest thing on this planet. While she’s a total sweetheart, she is still only five, and is prone to a bit of bouncing when she gets excited. Which is quite often.

Technically, it was a polework session. It was just that the poles weren’t on the floor.

At first this was a bit of a sticking point for Mum – or not sticking, as the case happened a couple of times. Over summer they came to an understanding and now Mum is just as “not bovved” as Gem is.

Mum’s new year’s resolution? To jump her horse.

Of course, Mum’s timescale was perhaps to build up to it slowly. Enter Phoebe, and a lesson which Mum thought was going to be a flatwork and poles session. Technically, it was a polework session – it was just that the poles weren’t on the floor.

I can’t tell you how proud I was of my wonderful Mum shoving her fears aside and just having a fab time with her horse. It was only a few months ago that
we had to talk her into cantering Gem, and here she was disappointed when she had to jump out of trot. Neither of us thought that she’d jump Gem much, if at all, but the giant smile on her face said it all. Potential Wobbleberry in training?

(Don’t tell her I’ve said that!)

But in all seriousness, it just goes to show what wonders a bit of confidence and positivity can do for you, especially when you know people you care about believe in you. If you’re struggling with confidence, surround yourself with people who are going to push you and build you up and go in meaning to have fun, and you’ll do so much better. And don’t let anyone make you think that what you’ve achieved isn’t good enough.

It’s better together!

This week, the focus was on showjumping.

I knew we were going to Keysoe for the BS at the weekend and I had it in my mind that I was supposed to be doing the British Novice after the clear round. I was OK with the idea, if not massively enthusiastic.

Since the last time I jumped Socks was mid-December I set up a three stride combination to practise over at home, complete with Socks’ favourite (sarcasm intended) pink and purple fillers. Was I being a bit mean? Probably. Did she jump it though? Yes. Did she also spend a good ten minutes spooking at some poles on the floor as I was warming up? You bet.

Socks facing off with the scariest poles on the planet. Obviously.

It’s really easy to get frustrated with my horse when she spooks at silly things like this. True, she does sometimes nap a bit but often in these situations she’s feeling unsure about something – even if that’s not what she’s spooking at – and it’s really important to make sure she feels safe and confident. Even if that’s not the easiest thing to do when she’s shot sideways at the same piece of fence for the third time in a row when there’s nothing there.

Something my dressage trainer, Lili, said to me came into my head at that point:

Let her make friends with it!

Realistically, she shouldn’t be spooking at some poles on the floor. Maybe she was napping. Maybe she was genuinely scared. But was me telling her off going to help? No, it would probably end up with me on the floor.

So, after a pep talk and lots of pats, Socks launched herself over the poles, and then felt together enough to walk and trot over them normally. Hooray. Did anyone tell her that Gem is the five-year-old, not her?

Anyway. We jumped around 85-90, and although she didn’t stop and dump me on the floor, as would have happened two years ago, it still wasn’t really the session I wanted, and I really didn’t want to do any more than the clear round at the weekend. Luckily, it turns out I wasn’t being a chicken, just sensible – Phoebe reminded me that I hadn’t jumped in public since Horseheath in October so not wanting to do the British Novice was entirely reasonable. My best riding buddy, Rachel, was going to be doing the clear round too with her ex-racer, Squirt, so I wasn’t going to be on my own.

Credit in the confidence bank

That Saturday, as it happened, turned out to be exactly what I needed.

There were quite a few of us who train with Phoebe all there, all cheering each other on and all just having a fab time.

There was plenty for me to feel nervous about – I couldn’t remember the last time I jumped Socks indoors, she’d been a bit looky in the week and there was plenty for her to look at, and there’s always that sneaky little feeling, although much weaker now, that she might just decide no and dump me on the floor – but I couldn’t believe the difference it made going out with a group of friends!

Maybe because I felt so much more zen, feeling like I was out for a day with my mates rather than going for my first jump in public for months, and maybe because I’ve gained a bit more confidence so I don’t ride quite so much like a lemon any more, Socks was absolutely mega. Not a stop, not a look, not even an inkling that two years ago this would have been so far out of our reach it was laughable. We had one down in our first round and went clear in the second, and Phoebe even told me to sit down and not let Socks get too fast – so obviously it wasn’t just me who got a confidence boost.

Even Mum got a bit teary seeing us both having a blast. Part of me wants to tell myself to get a grip – it was only one clear round and it wasn’t even competitive – but I can’t take for granted how far we’ve come, and it fuels my fire to do more, and do better. And then what was even better was being able to hang around with a cup of tea and some cheesy chips and cheer on my friends as they jumped their classes.

The only issue was, walking back to the lorry we realised Socks had pulled off a shoe. And she’d only been shod two days before. Agh!

We scoured the warm up, and the arena, but the shoe had obviously evaporated. We’d all but given up until my old Pony Club instructor pointed out that someone else had found it and put it on the fence. Hurrah!

But it gets better.

We also ran into our friend from our riding club, who’s partner just happens to be a farrier. Even better, he happened to have his tools with him and offered to put the shoe back on. What a guy!

No more getting Socks to stand on a rug so she didn’t get footsore on the gravel! (Yes my horse is a snowflake with awful thoroughbred feet. We’ve accepted this, and it’s just something we have to work with.)(This is why Mum went for a hardy Welsh cross…)

And the moral of the story is: life and horses are better with friends and positivity. Fact.

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